i am usually sleeping with a little help from benadryl. just half of a tablet. i always have the most vivid and adventurous of dreams. if i wake, i seldom fall quickly and easily into sleep again. i lay there and listen to the dogs barking next door or eric breathing softly or kaden whining and yelling at keane in his sleep. this is when i pray my sincere prayers. not that others are not sincere but daylight prayers are often distracted ramblings but nightlight prayers are desperate pleadings of intention and intercession. i pad into kneeling by my children's bedside, i float silently through the house. i think of family and friends... i thank the Lord for His nearness. falling back into sleep i ask, "my friend, will you please lay with me? will you rest with me and bless my dreams to honor you and give me rest? will you sleep with me? for i am so sleepy..."
Asleep. Then awake. And trying to read a two or five backward in the mirror. Often I'm adding just one more line to a story or poem, one that makes no sense in the morning. Lately I find myself singing a recent song I wrote. No Eric to tell me to take this phrase and put it there. Take this verse out completely, and try it with a different picking pattern. Of course at two, five in the mirror, nothing is in the proper order. Maybe it's time for me to remember what I learned--and go on. At this time of night, sleep may be a good idea.
The only thing that works now is prayer. My list is long. I have friends with difficulties far beyond anything I could handle. I place them in God's hands, close my eyes, and allow the night to continue, without daytime interferences.
i am usually sleeping with a little help from benadryl. just half of a tablet. i always have the most vivid and adventurous of dreams. if i wake, i seldom fall quickly and easily into sleep again. i lay there and listen to the dogs barking next door or eric breathing softly or kaden whining and yelling at keane in his sleep. this is when i pray my sincere prayers. not that others are not sincere but daylight prayers are often distracted ramblings but nightlight prayers are desperate pleadings of intention and intercession. i pad into kneeling by my children's bedside, i float silently through the house. i think of family and friends... i thank the Lord for His nearness. falling back into sleep i ask, "my friend, will you please lay with me? will you rest with me and bless my dreams to honor you and give me rest? will you sleep with me? for i am so sleepy..."
ReplyDeleteAsleep. Then awake. And trying to read a two or five backward in the mirror. Often I'm adding just one more line to a story or poem, one that makes no sense in the morning. Lately I find myself singing a recent song I wrote. No Eric to tell me to take this phrase and put it there. Take this verse out completely, and try it with a different picking pattern. Of course at two, five in the mirror, nothing is in the proper order. Maybe it's time for me to remember what I learned--and go on. At this time of night, sleep may be a good idea.
ReplyDeleteThe only thing that works now is prayer. My list is long. I have friends with difficulties far beyond anything I could handle. I place them in God's hands, close my eyes, and allow the night to continue, without daytime interferences.
Usually.
Beautiful...
ReplyDelete